Tuesday, August 25, 2009

All Eyes On Me


Let me preface this by saying I don't necessary have issue with the content of the conversation, but the method he chose to approach the conversation.

I've made no effort to hide my new tattoos. I didn't really want to start wearing long sleeves just to prolong when they'd find out about them. My mom gave Misty & Dodgie the evil eye a few times, but didn't say anything. Then this morning in the car on the way to work, my dad starts busting my balls about it. For those who don't know, I'm not a morning person. I hate mornings. I think they were invented by Satan to torture us. So if you want to talk to me about something important, don't do it before about 10am. I'll resort to biting your head off which is pretty much exactly what happened. Not only that, there was nowhere for me to go. So he's cornered me and instead of, say, walking away to cool off and have a reasonable conversation later, I'm relying on emotional reactions. He does it to my mom, too, so I dunno what the logic is behind it. I was seriously considering if I could tuck and roll and survive.

When I tried to address the underlying issues of why he forced me to agree to this stupid sabbatical or whatever in the first place, he was all "that's not the point". Then what is?! I don't feel guilty about going back on something I was strongarmed and guilted into agreeing to. It doesn't make me immature or unreliable. He knows full well that I'm actually very mature for my age (I know that sounds like such a 14 year old thing to say, but I have independent verification :P) and reliable. It's not like I offered someone a kidney and then backed out of it. The simple fact of the matter is we'll never agree on this. His three main arguments for why I shouldn't have the "volume" of tattoos I do are as follows:

1. It will hold me back professionally
2. I shirk my bills to pay for tattoos
3. No man will ever want me

Shall we examine these a bit more closely? I think yes.

1. Obviously not if I was just given a promotion and will be gaining a whole new set of job skills. There are tons of successful people in the world with way more tattoos than I have. I've demonstrated that covering them up isn't a big deal. Plus, I don't expect to be in the industry I'm in forever, so that may not always be the case. Who knows what I could end up doing. Even if I stay on this path, there's nothing wrong with wearing a full suit every day (with my own special touches of course!).

2. I actually save and budget quite carefully to make sure that I don't miss a bill in order to pay for a tattoo. On many occasions, I've put off or limited the length of a session to make sure I had the money on hand to pay everybody.

3. This one is just ridiculous to me. If my recent social life has been any indication whatsoever, if I really wanted a boyfriend, I could have one. I could have several. Even if there's a guy I like who doesn't like me because of my tattoos, then he very obviously wasn't meant for me. I would expect my mom to bust out with something like that, but my dad? Oy! I've found if anything guys like girls with tattoos because they think it means we're wild in other aspects as well. There may be some truth to that...

At some point I'm just gonna come out and tell him my whole grand plan. He won't change my mind, I can do that just fine on my own, but maybe he'll be more inclined to keep his mouth shut if he knew it was going to happen. Or maybe I'm just deluding myself. Either way, I plan on revealing my plans to him in the next week or so.

*goes to look for riot shield and tear gas*

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